Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
