So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
