Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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