omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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