you traded sex for a burrito?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
