Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
