these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
