so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Randomize
