So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Randomize
