ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i dont even know how to be here
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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