I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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