Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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