I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
