This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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