DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
