But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
