i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
