if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize