Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
