He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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