He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
