It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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