Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
id be glad to
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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