4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
