They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
