Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
