if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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