ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
