but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
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