Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
