What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Don't tell me you're on acid again
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
