Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
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