If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
