is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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