she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
