Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
