Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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