I wannas sexs uuuuu
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
