Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
