I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
She made me pour olive oil on her.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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