idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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