Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
