Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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