You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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