Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
