I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You've changed since you got that strap on
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize
