we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
