doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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