About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
