eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize